Tag Archives: toddlers

The Princess and the Pee

loo

After almost two years of patiently waiting, I am finally officially a home owner.  The apartment isn’t exactly the one I saw as a demo though. I had been told that the one I was signing up and paying a king’s ransom for would be “exactly” like the one I was shown. But when I went for my inspection prior to settlement there were some significant differences. To say I was disappointed would be a gross understatement.  Sadly, as I signed the contract in good faith I just have to live with it. 

 

Oh well, if you can’t live in the one you love, love the one you’re in. Might have been a bit easier if, whichever tradie had used my loo prior to lock up had bothered to flush it though. Or am I just being a princess? Luckily, despite my limitations, I didn’t have to have any alterations (except for the lowering of a few shelves) done before I moved in.  I did however get a very pretty decorated toilet seat to replace the standard white one. Officially this is because a completely white dunny surrounded by completely white walls means I couldn’t find the toilet. But really I just wanted a fancy throne.

 

My eyesight is particularly bad at the moment due to a recent illness so maybe I should have left the decorating for a while. But of course I didn’t, and I’m wondering if I’ll come to regret it. Every piece of furniture and all of the soft furnishings are super bright and colourful, (I used my Wonder Woman doll as the inspiration). Contrast was the order of the day to make everything easier to see  and it certainly seems to be working thus far. But I suspect my choice of electric blue curtains  with my multi-coloured lounge suite  might fall under the category of “seemed like a good idea at the time” as my eyesight improves.

 

I’m surprised at how easily I’ve taken to living on my own.  Granted, it has only been two weeks, But other than the plug getting stuck in the bathroom sink the first time I used it (requiring a plumber to fix it) and my brand new washer/dryer refusing to dry my clothes but instead washing the same load four times, there have been no major disasters yet.  That is unless you count the fact that all my lovely white smalls are now light blue due to one of my royal blue towels bleeding. On the bright side, at least they match with the decor now.

 

There is some peril in being a wobbly and legally blind woman living alone however. Especially if your appliances are out to get you…

 

The other night whilst getting ready for bed I was enjoying my favourite podcast, (The Dollop) on loudspeaker rather than headphones (yay for single living). Suddenly I heard a random woman’s voice coming from my kitchen. “shit” I thought to myself. Had I neglected to lock the front door properly?  I crept into the kitchen and checked the door. It was locked.  I scanned the room and everything was just as I’d left it so I assumed it must have been my over-active imagination (in the interests of full disclosure I had in fact forgotten to take my meds) and went off to bed.  As I reached for the switch to turn off the light something heavy ran into the back of my legs and an alarm went off.  I jumped in fright and turned to find that Rosie, my robotic vacuum cleaner (named after the robot maid owned by the Jetsons), had decided that the middle of the night was a good time to do some spring cleaning.   I scrambled for the remote and began randomly pressing buttons in an effort to get her to go back to the docking station. But like a petulant toddler she refused to move and I couldn’t lift her. I tried everything I could think of (including bribes and threats)Not sure what did it in the end, but after what seemed like an eternity she sprang to life and decided she’d had enough. Phew!

 

I’m sure that eventually I’ll get the hang of this independence thing. 

 

XOXO 

 

Nina – Marie Butler

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